(English)Man On The Moon From our Space (and Food Hygene) Correspondent, Barnes Thimbleton. |
A headfucking new blockbusting exposé of the NASA Apollo Space Program has thrown up an incredible twist - with a British flavour! (don't put headfucking - Ed.)
American author Truman Neuman (photo - left) has just published an astonishing new book - "Moonshot - The Barry Jarvis Story" that claims that when Apollo 11 landed on the Moon on July 20, 1969, the first steps were taken not by Neil Armstrong, but by British freelance pornographer, Barry Jarvis of Broadstairs in Kent. According to Neuman, Jarvis was on the Moon to photograph Armstrong's historic "first" steps - "NASA needed the photos, and they wanted Armstrong there first, 'cause he was like, The Man, but they needed a camera set up and obviously Buzz Aldwin couldn't do it, as he was second in command, so they needed someone else, and they took Barry on the quiet". Barry Jarvis (photo - below) hadn't talked to anyone about it and was amazed when Neuman approached him.- "I never told no one. It was just a cash in hand job, easy money. I wasn't too proud of the porno stuff I'd been doing so wasn't in the habit of sounding off about my work anyhows". "Armstrong was really pissed off, he wanted to be there first, but I just told him, 'Neil, you do the walking, I'll get the shots, you get the glory, I get the cash - it's a win/win situation.' " Jarvis was paid $4,000 and as much Duty Free as he could carry. "I left the States and set up a little photo studio in Broadstairs. I got a couple of visits from The Meninblack (CIA), who basically told me if I ever mentioned a word of it, I'd be discredited and ridiculed, but when Mr Neuman turned up, I figured, well I've been discredited and ridiculed all my life so what's new?" Neuman, who's previous books include, "Grassy Knoll Contenders!" and "Soccer Moms!", is vague about his sources for the book - "...Well, it's kind of hard to explain, it kind of came to me telepathically and the more people denied it, the more it confirmed in my mind that it was in fact true..." And why Jarvis?, "...when I was abducted, the 'Greys' were going on about this guy Jarvis, 'Where's Jarvis, what's he up to, is he happy, is he coming back' so I figured, you know, whatever ..." Has something strange ever happened to you? why not tell us about it!
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